Seventh Week

December 12, 2012

 

A Eulogy for my Beard

 

Alas, poor beard, you hardly existed:

You hardly lived, these last few weeks, at least

You never grew too much, except underneath my chin

You were an itchy mess

You looked like my pubes

(Except for being orange, what the fuck was that about?)

You made me look homeless

Although I don’t mind that

I wanted more

I wanted a Daniel Bryan-like beard

Or to look like a goat face

But, job interviews are calling

And the hope for a better, brighter, and fuller beard of Tomorrow

Interests me more

So, here is the end for now, my friend

Goodbye, Good luck, and Take Care; you’re flushed down the toilet or the sink

I don’t remember now, poor Yorick-like beard.

Farewell, and give my regards to the critters swimming in my fecal system.

 

December 13, 2012

 

I

Am.

 

December 14, 2012

 

Natalya Neidhart

Sara Del Rey

Portia Perez

Sarah Stock

Mickie James

Trish Stratus

And all other names that pop into my odd pro wrestling-minded head from time to time.

No doubt.

I love Pro Wrestling

Male and female

It’s Performance Art at it’s best in many cases

And who doesn’t love a good old ass-kicking match between crazy characters?

Undertaker versus whatever new loser for Wrestlemania

CM Punk: Best in The World

And John Cena being…Cena-ish, I suppose.

Not all things can be perfect, of course;

Nothing ever is, thanks Vinnie Mac.

 

December 15, 2012

 

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Rumble Young

Rumble Young Rumble Man

Young Man Rumble Rumble

Man Young Rumble Rumble

Young Rumble Rumble Man

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Young Rumble

Rumble Rumble Young Man

Rumble Rumble Man Young

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Rumble Young

Rumble Young Rumble Man

Young Man Rumble Rumble

Man Young Rumble Rumble

Young Rumble Rumble Man

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Young Rumble

Rumble Rumble Young Man

Rumble Rumble Man Young

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Rumble Young

Rumble Young Rumble Man

Young Man Rumble Rumble

Man Young Rumble Rumble

Young Rumble Rumble Man

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Young Rumble

Rumble Rumble Young Man

Rumble Rumble Man Young

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Rumble Young

Rumble Young Rumble Man

Young Man Rumble Rumble

Man Young Rumble Rumble

Young Rumble Rumble Man

Rumble Young Man Rumble

Rumble Man Young Rumble

Rumble Rumble Young Man

Rumble Rumble Man Young

Rumble Man Rumble Young

Rumble Young Rumble Man

Young Rumble Rumble Man

Rumble Young Man Rumble

 

December 16, 2012

 

Kevin Steen won

Dolph Ziggler won

A great day for pro wrestling

A great day to lay back and soak it all in

And a great day to see Cena lose

Huzzah.

 

December 17, 2012

 

Never drink milk

Ismael

You’ll only get an upset stomach

And deep philosophical questions about the universe and writing

While you’re on the can.

 

December 18, 2012

 

A Tribute to Daniel Bryan

 

YES YES YES YES YES YES

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
FLYING GOAT FLYING GOAT
The greatest thing going alive today

The man with the biggest beard in any sport

100 percent (non)vegan and a champ, no doubt

100 percent hero, Best in the World, and always putting on a great show;

Guaranteed.

I guess we’ve all got our heroes; some are scientists or boxers or authors or fucking fashion models or reality TV jack-offs or something else; different strokes for different folks, I guess.

My hero is Daniel Bryan aka Bryan Danielson aka American Dragon aka The Best in The World.

That’s that.

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